ADULTS TALK: Who Should Say ‘THANK YOU’ After Sex?

Male Angle
Don't trivialise it
When I first wondered about this question, I thought it was something actually ridiculous, but after having discussed it with my wife and a few friends, I must say that I agree with a lot of the things everyone said. Let me explain here. I definitely agree it can be a little sexy to say it, but it depends on the familiarity and the relationship you both have. But I also completely understand how many people can be made to feel like a used piece of crap, a prostitute, or it just being plain awkward if they get thanked every time they had sex with their partners.
I can see it from both sides. But it just depends on the situation. Men also have the same issues to think about. For us, it is also about being put on the center stage and our sexual performance is being verified, acknowledged and praised or abused. It's like a prized bull or horse being praised while being used for breeding. A lot of men will even question why there should even be a need for them to say it when it was something mutually enriching that we just took part in. For a lot of husbands, it's also about having paid the woman's bride price. Most men just cannot fathom why they should say so to a woman that the society understands to be theirs and this has nothing to being chauvinistic.
For most peopleespecially women, thanking your partner is an essential part of a relationship. They believe that it shows that you acknowledge that they did something that made today just a little bit nicer for you. They go further to say that if we can thank each other for washing the dishes or listening to our rants, or even just giving a cuddle when it's needed, why should sex be any different? For them, sometimes when you really needed sex and your partner made the extra effort to make it good, why should you not acknowledge that? Why would you not communicate that you appreciate it? They tell you it's also about respecting your partner notwithstanding that both of you had consensual sex.
It's an expression of gratitude and appreciation and they really want their partner to understand that. But on the other hand, while thinking this topic through, I had to ask a few friends of mine of both genders to get a wider scope on the subject matter and the answers I got from them got me thinking about how a lot of people do perceive consensual sex. People had a lot of different perspectives in the responses they gave. Some of them said that thanking your partner does seem to be implying that they are doing you a favor by having sex with you and that would be off putting to them, because sex only happens if it is of mutual desires, and they would feel the need to correct the idea that they were nota reluctant participant.
They saidit's never even crossed their mind to thank their partners. And why in the world should they even do such. It suggests that you only did it as a favor. Like you submitted to sex to please your man, and it wasn't also pleasurable for you. I would prefer that my woman assumes we had sex because I desired it, and it wasn't just pleasurable the way watching someone open a cool present you bought them is pleasurable. Though it's not wrong to thank your partner after sex, but it's also not wrong to be uncomfortable with being thanked.
If every time I kissed my wifeshe thanked me for the kiss, I'd tell her to knock it off, because for me it is unnecessary. In all seriousness, I believe there are more pleasant non-verbal ways of expressing thanks. A cozy shower for two after the deed is one. Also,legs entwined throughout the night after the deed if it was at night is another. Repeated and sensual physical contacts or kisses all over after the deed should also show my appreciation. Or even breakfast in bed. Finally, a tender brush of your partner's hair while gazing into her eyes with a soft smile on your lips will also show your tender gratitude without turning the deed into a business encounter. I believe that an acknowledgement that something beautiful and special took place between you two shouldn't be trivialized with just a "thank you".
Female Angle
It's gentlemanly to say 'Thank you'
Much as sex remains a two- way game that is savoured by the two parties involved, I see no big deal in men saying thank you to their women after an appreciable session. For one particular reason, sex, as far as relationship experts are concerned, is the most precious gift a woman can give to a man. So, showing some appreciation simply means that you don't just consider sex a given.
For most women, it does not come easy or cheap except, it is one that is given with some indifference. When it is wilfully offered, the man will love every minute of it. Besides, the majority of the sex rounds that couples have are desired by men and women most of those times just participated not because they are interested but because they just want to please their partners. So, why shouldn't they be appreciated? Most of the times, women are worn out by the stress from their jobs, house chores and a couple of one or two things in the affair but for the sake of peace, they just offer themselves as a sacrifice and the men, for the bliss of having their ways and unmindful of all of these, most of the time, keep grinding away for as much as the show last.
Taking time to say thank you after a round is quite good. Apart from the fact that it gives the woman the feeling that she is not one of the pieces of your acquisitions in the house, she is encouraged to look forward to more rounds. So, why should it be a problem, I mean, what do you stand to lose? In addition, learning to say the right words before, during, and after Sex can turn her on, boost her confidence, and make her keep coming back for more. It is simply gentlemanly. Whatever the situation, women love to talk to you.
This is because for women, verbal communication is key to emotional intimacy. And intimacy is, in turn, is a common prerequisite for getting it on. In general, men tend to get an emotional connection through sex, but women need to get an emotional connection to want sex. What you tell your bed buddy has the power to crank up her arousal, confidence, and make sex even more amazing for the both of you. Meanwhile, before saying thank you, it is important that you take note of these facts,
1. Be genuine: You've got to mean what you say and not just because that's the gentlemanly thing to do. Your body language always tells the truth, and if it isn't in-sync with your words, she's going to call your bluff, she won't appreciate it and it won't achieve the goal that it was meant to achieve.Since women are superior to men at picking up on these things, although you, as a man, may be able to read her body language, your chances of successfully faking sincerity are grim, so, don't say thank you when you really did not mean it.
2. It makes you sound more thoughtful. Women love men who talks about their good sides more than the bad ones and appreciating her bedmatics can only make her glad and appreciate you the more. Even if you are not going to say thank you exactly, you can just look into her eyes and utter words like, "You look beautiful" or "You always make me feel blessed as a man."
3. Whatever you choose to say, get straight to the point. You don't have to be a chatterbox while talking to her. Keep it short and sweet. No rambling. Other things you can say to make her feel appreciated are- "Your hair looks great that way." While any physical compliment can make her feel attractive, focusing on something you know she's put a lot of effort into tells her you're paying attention and that you appreciate her efforts. "I love how passionately you kiss." It's important for women to know you like kissing them. "I feel so good when I'm with you." Letting her know that she makes a difference in your life makes her feel significant, special, and sensual. This is an intimate form of expression that women long for and when they get it, they want to reciprocate with more sex. "I love the way you taste." Just like how you worry about your own endowment, she's concerned about what you'll think of her private parts. 'Wow' Though short and simple, it is just one perfect way of saying thank you. "I could just lie here with you forever." Yeah, it sounds like a lyric from a song, but you wouldn't imagine the magic that such words can do at such times. Saying thank you in any of the way listed above to your woman is not just a compliment, it is a magic that works wonders on your level of intimacy. It opens her eyes to what you like and what she should do again. And you can keep praising her skills hours or even days after having sex. Who knows? It might even inspire another spur of the moment. I am sure you guys will now agree with me that all is geared towards your interest